Articles Tagged ‘The Cougar Club - meeting a Cougar at the gym’

How to Meet A Cougar at the Gym

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Hi Lucia,

I see this woman almost everyday at the gym. I'm 24 and she looks like she could be 35 at the most. We constantly exchange looks throughout the 1.5 hours we're there. However, it's like high school where if I catch her, she'll look away quickly or if she knows I'm looking, she'll do something sexy in my direction!

I finally found the courage to greet her and ask for her name (outside of the gym for privacy, and no eyes!) as she was leaving to go back to work. She faced me with the biggest smile and gave me her name (no hesitation). I gave her mine, shook her hand and told her it was a pleasure to finally meet her and that she was gorgeous! The smile she had never left her face throughout the conversation, even as she was walking up the stairs as we parted.

How can I tell for sure if she is interested so I can make my move? Are there any other signs I can look for? How can I grab her attention/interest more? Marcus

Hi Marcus,

You're certainly very observant! You've already made your move. She definitely seems interested to me. Now you want to build on that. Do not ask her out just yet. You want to build some anticipation.

When you see her, if it's convenient and appropriate, have brief conversations with her. That means that if she's on the other side of the gym, you don't head over there unless you were already planning on going in that direction. If she's talking to someone, don't stand around waiting for them to stop talking. Walk by and wave hello. You don't want to appear too anxious.

The times you do talk to her, you can observe her body language. Does she show her teeth when smiling, play with her hair, touch herself (not there!) or touch you on the arm, shoulder, etc. These are all signs that she's interested, especially if she touches you. When women are interested in someone, they want to touch him. If they're not, the last thing they want to do is touch him!

You can ask her out after talking with her for about a week or two if she has shown signs of interest and after you've confirmed that she is single. Otherwise, she may be attached and was simply flirting.

 

Is She A Cougar?

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Hi Lucia,
 
I'm 23 years and there is a 40ish, extremely hot lady at the gym who dresses to kill and seduce. She does wear a ring or should I say more than one. How can I find out if she is a Cougar? Sean
 
Hi Sean,
 
The fact that she dresses to "kill and seduce" as you say (although, shouldn't it be the other way around), could mean one of two things:
 
1) She is indeed a Cougar who is on the prowl and wants to attract as much attention as possible or
2) She's in a relationship or married and not getting enough attention, so she uses her clothes to make her feel wanted and attractive, but she has no intentions of going any further.
 
As usual, the only way to know if she's available is to talk to her. When people are available, they're more willing to socialize at the gym, so strike up a conversation.
 
To learn how to do this, check out my recording "How to Catch a Cougar".